Here is the meaning of the parable, or at least the meaning of the obscure references:
Zapata County Pig is the title of a page with a picture of a giant hog, kind of like the urban legend Hogzilla. If you are looking for this picture, you need to use quotes around the phrase “zapata county pig” in your search string.
This search is a goofy one that got routed to my blog by accident. When these kinds of hits become numerous, I try to spoof them, just for fun. I do the same thing when I start getting a lot of hits from military domains, or from poet/mathematicians in Texas who are named after Mexican revolutionaries and restaurants.
The phrase “a time, times, and a half” is from Daniel 12:7. It places this story in the middle of the biblical End Times.
“in a Galaxie far, far away” — As in Star Wars.
“far away from Kansas” — As in The Wizard of Oz.
The Ford Galaxie was a huge car that was available as a convertible. I almost bought one once just for the looks.
“north along US 83” — Toward the city of Zapata in Zapata County, Texas.
A democracy is two wolves and a sheep voting on what to have for lunch.
In the Eagles’ song “Life in the Fast Lane,” the two criminals are described as follows: “He was a hardheaded man, he was brutally handsome; and she was terminally pretty.”
Lycans are werewolves. The term is used by some people nowadays who believe that they are werewolves. No, really.
“It’s the pigs!” — Traditional shout of criminals who are about to resist arrest.
“The sheep started to fidget nervously.” — Foreshadowing its demise. This turns into a recurring dramatic element that adds to the suspense.
“the porcine figure waddling toward him” — It’s not a “pig,” it’s a pig!
“dressed all in black and carrying a Colt M4 Flat Top assault rifle” — Like a lot of SWAT team police nowadays.
“the figure had a black knit mask over his ears and around his snout, showing only a pair of large, swinish eyes” — Like a Zapatista, but more comical.
“Hola, señor!” — One of the official languages of the future American Union will be Spanish.
“southern Mexican Castillano” — From Chiapas, the base of the EZLN, the Zapatista movement. Latin Americans call Spanish “Castillano”= Castilian, the dialect that is officially sanctioned as the language of Spain.
“As he held out his left hand” — Where he had received the Mark of the Beast (the Antichrist), of course. This has a double meaning: a manlike beast has the Mark of the Beast, who is a man.
“His eyes narrowed when he noticed the masked snout.” — He may have been expecting regular police officers rather than the Revolutionary Guard.
Applied Digital Systems — The manufacturer of the best available implantable ID chip as of 2006.
CarnoScanner — A means of tracking predators in the future.
“Do you have a license to transport this sheep, señor?” — An excuse to harass the wolves.
gunfight scene — Inspired by the movie Ghost Dog.
“The driver’s side pig stepped back, then held his M4 up high to aim down at the wolf laying across the center console.” — I’ve seen paramilitary fighters in movies do this.
Strawboy, Sticks — Two of the Three Little Pigs. Strawboy was the least protected, and he was caught by surprise.
tripas = chitlins or pig intestines, sometimes used to make tasty tacos in Mexico.
cerdito = piggy; this is a translated reference to the Nine Inch Nails song “Piggy”
El Pingüino = The Penguin. The nickname of a deformed rooster used by Subcomandante Marcos to illustrate certain political points.
When the Mexican government claimed to reveal Marcos’ identity, his supporters started using the catchphrase “Todos somos Marcos” to show how everyone is an insurgent. Eventually this mutated into “Todos somos pingüinos” to show how everyone is a victim. Is that the ultimate goal: To make everyone into a victim? It seems so.
In my apocalyptic scenario, “the new boss is the same as the old boss” — as in the song “Won’t Get Fooled Again” by The Who. And the functionaries of this revolutionary government become its victims, just as with Robespierre in the French Revolution and Trotsky after the Russian Revolution.
We could go further, such as to speculate about how the pigs, the symbols of working-class industriousness, are used by the world government to control the aggrandizing wolves who previously took advantage of democracy to devour the sheep. But that would be a little too deconstructionist.